Me & Everyone: Learning Acceptance

 It has almost been two years since I've been at home and there is to much I've learnt about myself and everyone around me. Everyday there's so much l hear from so many people and it can get overwhelming at times. It is always going to be a difficult task to listen without taking things to heart. Sometimes things are not even directed at me but l take it personally and somehow apply it to my context. Being at home for two years has taught me how different every person is. Thoughts, feelings, opinions, judgements, all vary greatly within my family. There are days that are mundane with barely anything significant happening and there are days with excitement about silly things and there are also days with high tension and arguments. Some of these experiences are pleasant and some of them get me thinking till a point where it interferes with everything else. 

One of the things I’ve realised is how difficult it is to accept some things even if I know that’s how it always has been and that’s probably how it’s always going to be. We all hold our belief systems strongly, if I’m not going to compromise on mine then it’s unfair to expect someone else to. It’s not possible to agree with everyone on everything and it’s also not right to expect them to feel or think differently. It’s natural to feel annoyed by some actions and opinions, the right thing to do is express that and explain my stance. With time patience and understanding grows, it has taken me a long time to come to terms with the fact that you can love a person but still disagree with them. It can be upsetting but everyone has a reason for what they know and do, there is a history of lived experience that has made them who they are and that experience is not mine so I will naturally be very different. I know this but it is still the easiest thing to forget in a moment of stress before losing my temper. Our position will always feel the most valuable to us and rightly so but with time I’ve realised that’s the case with everyone which means agreement is an almost impossible thing. 

I am not the most patient person, I am not the most understanding person but I hope I become someone who can accept others for who they are. My happiness and mental peace should be determined by me, what others do and say will invariably have effects on my feelings but learning to accept and understand who said what and why will help me filter what is important and what’s not important enough to alter my thoughts and feelings. At the end of the day we are all constantly trying to establish our own identities, understand ourselves better and in the process also understand everyone else. It’s an exercise in perpetuity and I hope love, acceptance and patience make it more fulfilling.