Out Of The Window

 It has almost been two years since I've been at home and there is to much I've learnt about myself and everyone around me. Everyday there's so much l hear from so many people and it can get overwhelming at times. It is always going to be a difficult task to listen without taking things to heart. Sometimes things are not even directed at me but l take it personally and somehow apply it to my context. Being at home for two years has taught me how different every person is. Thoughts, feelings, opinions, judgements, all vary greatly within my family. There are days that are mundane with barely anything significant happening and there are days with excitement about silly things and there are also days with high tension and arguments. Some of these experiences are pleasant and some of them get me thinking till a point where it interferes with everything else.  One of the things I’ve realised is how difficult it is to accept some things even if I know that’s how it always has bee

I woke up at 5 am this morning and stared at the ceiling, waiting for two hours to pass before I could get up and do something for the day. In those two hours like numerous other hours on numerous other days, I kept thinking about things I could do to make my day productive. In the first few days after I finished my final semester, it took me a while to let go of my lingering anxiety. Every moment of rest felt unreal, almost illegal because I felt I was doing something I shouldn’t be. Eventually a pattern set in and I loved every moment of not doing anything. It soon became disturbing when I constantly felt the need to make the best use of this time, to be productive, to throw myself into something meaningful which would have value for my career. I felt inadequate when I saw my peers posting screenshots of their certificates and internships. I was doing something throughout the day though, from putting clothes in the washing machine to drying them, trying new recipes, painting with no

The speck of black hung tight The smooth white engulfed it Mounting itself like a parasite it grew Crawling seamlessly into the milky sands Barely visible to the naive eye It established it's comfortable position It came to be accepted as an imperfection Living under the great white shadow The little black eye began to open Drawing attention of the admirers Black against white was beautiful they said Unaware of the pregnant darkness The speck became a dark moon  Glistening in it's glory  The white waned to become pallid  Perfection was tainted  A mask was pressed onto the tarnish The pretense was charming Yet the dark eye blinked  Dimming the light to a flicker

I often wonder why each day of our lives we either forget things that spark joy or take on things that overshadow joy. Everything that we do is in the hope that there will be a tomorrow and that we want it to be better. When that tomorrow arrives, it is spent as an investment for the future. Is it practical to look forward to something that may never come? Or is it practical to completely deny the possibility of a future that rests on the present foundation? Almost everything that we do is in preparation for the future. We are told to go to school because we need to go to college. We are told to go to college because we need to work. We are told to go to work because we need to support a family. The cycle is never ending, there is always because 'insert something in the future'. We are rarely told to live in the present. Every struggle in the present is justified as a sacrifice for the future. The conditioning, the cautioning, has made me fear the future. When something is unk

Hegemony, a term coined by Antonio Gramsci refers to the process of moral and intellectual leadership through which dominated or subordinate classes. In his work the Prison Notebooks, he talks about hegemony in the context of the post-1870 Industrial Western Europe. Hegemony which was initially associated with the political sphere now dominates almost every aspect of society. There is cultural, political, military, economic and even patriarchal hegemony in the present. Patriarchal hegemony is especially of concern to India where through decades of conditioning, women have been subordinated and a male-dominated power structure has been established. The process of reinforcing and legitimising gender roles and norms has made the institution of patriarchy so strong that it seems almost natural. The hegemonic masculinity seeks to establish complete control over the female mind and body. It also specifies a notion of 'feminity' that is biased and uphold the man as being the ultima

Existence, existentialism and existential crisis are some of the words that we hear being thrown around casually. It is not often that we stop to think about what those terms mean or what it means to exist. When it comes to existentialism, we are all certain of one thing (hopefully) that is the fact that we exist. A lot of times we would have encountered situations where we feel completely lost and we feel a sense of isolation or meaninglessness. That is precisely what existentialism says, the world itself is not meaningful but we as individuals have the capacity to shape the world around us to derive a purpose or meaning. Everything that we do in our daily life is relevant only because we have chosen to assign that significance to it. We as human beings have all the freedom to do as we please which is starkly evident in what we have done to the world. Choice is what determines who we truly are. We choose to study, read, eat, wear only certain things, all of which contributes to a m